Lazy days. Not good for the psyche.

I am entering the "I'm not doing anything with my life so I'm questioning my worth" phase of my life. Staying up too late at night and doing nothing with my days. Feeling guilty for taking up space. Not like I'm mooching off of anyone though; I have money... it's just that feeling; you know the one. I went through years of school and now I'm done and I'm not doing anything with it... but I just want some time to myself, you know? This is the first time in, what, twenty-one years that I haven't been in school? I've never, ever taken time off, and I think I deserve it.

Went out with Jesse today. We sat for a bit at the Coffee Bean. I grabbed some lunch from Daphne's Greek Café and felt rather gipped. I ordered the vegetarian pita with a Greek salad on the side. Turns out, all that the vegetarian pita is is Greek salad with a smear of hummus on a pita, so what I basically ordered was two Greek salads with a pita and a smear of hummus. Effers. Went back to Jesse's place afterwards and watched 'Collateral' which I'd been meaning to see for ages. So brilliant. It did not disappoint.

This weekend I'm heading up to Northern Faire. I'm half-excited and half-not. When I have nothing to do with my days, I find that I tend to hermit myself away. I've been sort of anti-social lately, so while I know I'm going to have an excellent time this weekend, there's still that dread in the pit of my stomach at the idea of being so far away from home in an unfamiliar place. Not to mention, there are certain people that I really want to see, and I know that if they're not there I'll be sorely disappointed, and that's pre-bumming me out. I know it's silly to let myself get into that mood, but I guess if I get sullen about it beforehand, then maybe I can get over it beforehand, that way I won't be so disappointed when I get up there and they're not there, and if they are, hey, even better, right?